Bullies who act out of chronic, predatory anger may not seem angry, because their actions aren’t driven by active frustration. Look for them by their behavior patterns. Bullies seek to hurt people; they use anger as a tool, by conscious choice.
“Many angry predatory people have a difficult time accepting responsibility for the consequences of what they do. Nothing is ever their fault. This is called blame externalization.”
Bullies have found that their behavior gets them what they want, so they inflict pain on anyone who tries to force them to change. Thus, if you have a Bully in your life, rather than hope for a transformation, you may have to distance yourself or even sever the relationship.
“Every angry episode carries with it a considerable amount of risk. Even the most predatory criminals know that there is no such thing as a risk-free crime or act of aggression.”
Use the following precautions to protect yourself from angry bullies with whom you must remain in contact:
Make it clear that you won’t participate in office politics.
Reveal as little personal information as possible.
Don’t call attention to yourself by bragging about your successes.
Don’t provoke a backlash by gossiping or unkind behavior.